30 December 2007

The Price of Outsourcing

I just returned from a very important mission from which I learned an extremely valuable lesson: Don't outsource. At first it seems that it's worth it because you are saving money, but as I learned today the overall price you pay isn't worth it.

I was stationed at an undisclosed area waiting for a Zionist patrol to pass by so I could explode an improvised explosive device (IED). When the time finally came, I lit the fuse but it didn't go off. What happened was that the fuse was outsourced because it was a little cheaper. I have already filed a formal complaint that the fuses aren't functioning properly and we shouldn't use them anymore. Let's wait and see if the democratic process will work here in the cave and my voice will be heard.

27 December 2007

It Wasn't Us!!

The news was so great it even reached the bowels of my cave. Benazir Bhutto, the first female Prime Minister of Pakistan, was killed today in a shooting/suicide bombing attack. The blood hasn't yet stopped pulsating out of her and people are already blaming Muslims for her killing. They say that we are "radicals" and "extremists" and wanted her dead because of her views. The views she had about the world and the view she showed the world. They say we hated her because she didn't support terror and she didn't cover her face. While it is true that she committed these atrocious crimes and needs to be punished for them, her killing was not done by Muslims. It was done by American pagans.

The Americans hope to cause civil unrest with her killing, making the terrorists look bad in the world's opinion, thereby justifying their occupation of Arab land. I plead with you on behalf of the entire Arab and Muslim community to not be fooled by the infidel propaganda. Please, look at the facts I have mentioned and you will see that I speak only the truth.

25 December 2007

Kassam Memories

A really weird thing happened to me yesterday. I went to visit my brother, Zibala, in the hospital to see how he is doing. Praise to Allah, he is doing better and will soon be able to continue manufacturing bombs. But as I tried to get back home I realized that it was impossible for me to get to RamAllah because of the Christian holiday. As a result there were many Zionist soldiers out looking to kill innocent Palestinians and bathe in their blood because they know that Palestinian blood is holy. So I was forced to remain in an Israeli city and pretend to be an American tourist, something which I have learned in my training. So here I am, in an Israeli internet cafe, drinking coffee and telling you about a problem I just uncovered.

It seems that the Zionist state is preparing to
defend themselves against our Kassam rocket attacks. This is not good news for me, as it will stop our acts of terror against the Jews. So I decided to post a short clip for you to see. It is of a Kassam rocket attack against Israeli cities, something which in the near future may become nothing more than just a memory of times long gone. In the video you will see that we launched the Kassam from a school, in this way the Israelis can't strike back without bombing a school and then the whole world will support what we did, and what we will do in the future. Brilliant, isn't it? I apologize for the quality of the video, it was taken with my camera and is a little grainy.

23 December 2007

Who's Really Primitive?

The Zionists have once again interfered with our internet connection. This time they blocked my access to Al-Jazeera so I was forced to view a Western news site. But you must understand, the choice to read the news from the West wasn't mine. The Zionists have not only blocked Al-Jazeera, but anyone trying to go there was redirected to another site. This was my first time viewing this site and I must say I was greatly disappointed. The West is always preaching about tolerance, yet this site was anything but that. As soon as the page loaded I was immediately attacked by Western religious beliefs. Why don't they ask me what religion I am before the page loads so that they can create content befitting my religion? Why do they make these alternating pattern of colors, and why is that man on the left wearing a cross? This would never happen at Al-Jazeera. Al-Jazeera is always careful with which content is viewed by whom. For instance, they know that Westerners can't always handle the truth so on their English site they post the news slightly different for their viewer's safety. Shame on you, Matt Drudge, why can't you learn from us how to appeal to the masses?

18 December 2007

RIP Hentish

The bloodthirsty American infidels have killed another citizen of Iraq - Hentish. Hentish was a beloved dog who did not do anything wrong, yet was killed. Hentish was unarmed and defenseless and posed no threat to the invaders, why did they kill him?! Hentish was friendly to American reporters so they killed him. Just because we, freedom fighters, are friends of American journalists doesn't mean that dogs who are friends of journalists need to be killed. This is yet another proof how ruthless the infidels are.

16 December 2007

Trouble Ahead

The news reaching my cave from the United States is very troubling. Why don't the American people see how good Hillary Clinton will be as President? I know that she will do what is right and what is best for the Middle East. She has many times shown that she truly cares about us here, as the picture illustrates. In the picture she is kissing Suha Arafat, the wife of the late President of Palestine Yasser Arafat. I am sure that these two great women will continue their strong friendship when Hillary is elected and together they will solve all of the world's problems.

12 December 2007

Zibala's accident

The past few days have been very hard for me. My brother, Zibala, was injured in a work accident preparing a bomb. The infidels came in middle of the night and switched the detonator he was using so it exploded before Zibala finished working on the bomb. Luckily he wasn't next to it when it exploded, he was in the next room. Here is a picture of what it looked like after the Jews switched my brother's detonator with theirs. He was injured and is in the hospital now and I really want to go visit him. However, it was impossible for me to leave the village without being seen by the pagan Zionists. Because it is their holiday, they added many roadblocks and many more soldiers on the streets. But now that the holiday is over I hope to be able to make it to the hospital. I will hopefully keep you informed of Zibala's condition.

06 December 2007

Home Sweet Home

I am back home in my cave now. That was an exhausting trip! Because I travelled in a caravan it took me a very long time to reach Sudan. By the time I got there it was too late. It's a shame I left my package of surface-to-air missiles back at home.

On the way back one of the camels in the caravan broke its leg so we had to stop and wait for its rider to sharpen his knife before taking the camel out of its misery. On the way back we were deafened by the warplanes of the Israeli Zionist occupying infidel. They timed the flight for when we were praying so that it would disturb us. But was I disturbed? No! I was strengthened and prayed to Allah to bring down his vengeful wrath upon the enemy.

I hear someone moving around, I'm not sure if it's Abu-Ali going to do his nightly check or not. I don't want him to catch me communicating with you infidels, for then he will surely have me beheaded, may Allah have mercy on me.

02 December 2007

I'm Still Alive!

Greetings, fellow underground bloggers!! I know I have not posted in a long time and I am sorry for that. I know that many of you thought I had been killed or worse: captured by the Israeli infidels! But no, I was in Iran organizing a meeting to counter the obscenities of Annapolis, Maryland. The picture is of one of the sessions we had about our predicament. I needed to hide the identity of the participants because I know that the infidels will want to know who was there.

Iran is a strange country, they didn't have any internet in their caves!! I guess Al Gore hasn't visited them yet. Time is short, for I must now leave to Sudan. There are things I need to take care of there. I hope Al Gore has already been to Sudan and I will be able to update you from there. But this mission will be a difficult one for me, so I ask of you to please have me in your prayers to Allah.